New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

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DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

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What did the phone say to the man? Ring ring.

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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Creepy Man: Let's play the rape game Young Girl: No!!!! Creepy Man: That's the spirit

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

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why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

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What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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Knock knock. Whose There? Megan Megan Who? Your Wife...

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

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knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

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A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

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i find your gravy quite lumpy.

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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A nuclear device is dropped on hiroshima. Does it make a sound? The answer is yes because the americans are laughing in Enola Gay

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory because she kept throwing away the w's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops