Want to hear a dirty joke? Mud.

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

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What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

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Okay okay, its not like I wanted a serious answer anyway, bye!

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

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A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

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What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

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Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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When you cross a bird on the sidewalk what do you do??? Run in big circles.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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Black people deserve to be slaves for their entire lives. WHITE POWER.

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What's cold, limp, approximately 65 pounds, and being dragged out of that pool with no safety fence over there? Not important, lets go get some Wendy's man.

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All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

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If three men were rowing a rowboat backwards across your front lawn, and six of the four back wheels fell off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? 17 because footballs don't have feathers.

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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