Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

neil patrick harris

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will cause me to develop a drinking problem.

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

Q: How many 3 go into the number 102,351? A: Yes.

knock knock come in

What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

Why do people read Bibles? To learn about God.

Pickles

Is this where I type the joke?

A Mexican walks up to a fence in Texas and watches as the police take away his next door neighbor for tax evasion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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