"Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?" said the little girl. "I don't know", said the mother," we were robbed of all our money and posessions. And your father was killed while we were gone.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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What's worse than not finding your true love in high school? Dying

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why did ya dad eat ya food?? because ya sister

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What's the deal with airline food?

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when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

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whats worse than a dead cat in your apple? a dead baby in your apple.

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You.

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Roses are red violets are blue i got two fingers just for you/by kw

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

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A man walks into a bar with tears rolling down his cheeks. The bartender asks why are you so blue? The man says he has blue skin disorder and that everyone has been making fun of him...

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

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If there are 3 apples, and you take 2, how many do you have? BLAM! Texas castle law, motherfukker!

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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this is not a joke

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hi patrick

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How do you kill a cow while your carrying a gun Shoot him

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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