What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

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What did the podiatrist say to the proctologist? That athletes foot fungus is clearing up nicely.

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What's stronger than then the love of a mother and her child? A semi-truck

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The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

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Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

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A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

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When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

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What did the black man say when he ate a Hershey bar? Delicious

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A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

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Why do Eskimos build igloos? Because it is the most practical form of habitation for their climate zone, lifestyle, and availability of materials.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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Dani barton= lovely

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What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

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I'm a brony. I'm a brony. I'm a brony. Screw this shit, I'm not a brony anymore. I'm a man. I'm a man. Screw this too. I'm dead, not in bed.

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

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What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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