what do you call a guy that has a mouth, but cannot speak? a poor freshman who has been commanded by a Senior not to speak.

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

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What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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http://Youtube.com/User/PeGamer22

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This little pig went to market, This little pig stayed at home, This little pig had pork chops, And this little pig was GONE...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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knock knock WUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!!!! WUUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! WUUUUUZZZZUU......

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

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how do you save a black guy from drowning. with a life preserver.

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What gas station can u make a Kwick trip at? Kwick trip

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If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

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What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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What's a small person? A midget

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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