whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Donald Trump

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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