What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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