Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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