How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

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What was the motto of the Holocaust? Yolo.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops