Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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What did Hellen Keller say to her baby cousin? Nothing

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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sadf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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