How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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