Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

How does a black guy die? Unknown

A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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