A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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Q: why are black people so much darker than white people? A: genetics.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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