In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

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Jovan

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

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What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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