what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

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roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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25

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There's my tractor.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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