Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

whos a sick fuck? jake morris

Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

What is the the mistake..... 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...