What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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Chuck Norris.

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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