A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

thumb_up thumb_down +10

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops