How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops