A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

How come dinosaurs don't talk? Because they're dead.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

What do you call a exceptionally funny anti joke? Well, usually cruel and extremely vile.

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

Knock Know! Come in!

What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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