What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

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Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

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what did the black guy say to the white comedian? haha

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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