What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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jess always squints her eyes when making a point

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What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

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Roses are red Violets are baskets This joke makes no sence... ... boobs

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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What is the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes you laugh and one is just a clown.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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Hello penis

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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You know what happens when you assume right? Well, you make an educated guess based on prior knowledge to the circumstance at hand.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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