What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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Whats 1+1? window!

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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