What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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