How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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kkkk

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

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what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What is worse than torture? Not much.

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A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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