Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

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What do Grant and Lee have in common? They're both black males

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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