What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

thumb_up thumb_down +12

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Please don't shoot me

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats black white and red all over an abused child

thumb_up thumb_down +12

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Three gay men walk into a bar and there is only one three-legged stool. What do they do? --One man politely tells one of the other men to have a seat and then the two remaining men leave and have a one-night stand.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the girl take a shower? Because she was dirty

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why cant Helen Keller drive? ......because women cant drive(:

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops