A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

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What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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it was all Tagart

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You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops