What do chickens, pictures and babies have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why didn't the little boy wake up today? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? Perhaps he was doing a project on tree-life.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

kill yourself....with a cigarette

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats funnier than Steven Yuhasz being Straight? Womens Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down -15

So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats disappointing and not funny? this joke. ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops