What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

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How High is a Chinese man

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whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

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Daniel G. Likes to perve on the boys in the locker room. Change quick guys!

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Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops