Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

Men

A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...