Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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Can anyone Lenin money?

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Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

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What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

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how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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The duck didn't cross the road.

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what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops