I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

Gay marriage is freaking gay.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

Whats the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have a Bar Mitzvah in Holocaust Germany.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

24

why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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