What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, although depending on how high the light in question is and where it's located she may need someone to help hold a ladder for her, if it's particularly unsteady.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

A man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie emerged from the lamp. The genie asked what his new master's wishes were. The man wished for asthma.

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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