What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

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Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

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how many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? none, they hire mexicans to do it

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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