If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Ready for something funny? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the white man buy a new pair of socks? His old ones has holes.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a joke that is not funny? An un - funny joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did one salt shaker say to the other salt shaker? Nothing, Salt shakers are merely used to add flavor to foods.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did marybeth fall off the swing i shot her in the fart box and she died

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops