A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian food that is an American favorite, and the other is a follower of Judaism.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did the racist say to the other racist? Hey how was yesterday's clan meeting?

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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