How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

you gay?

if life hands u melons, make melonade.

Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

A bus crashes and everybody dies.

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

Erron who the hell are you? How many people are you going to use before you finish whatever the fuck is on your agenda?

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with no punchline

Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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