Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Have you heard the one about the dead guy? Neither has he.

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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