Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

The Labour Party.

What did Thisara say? You cant see me bich

"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

Question: how many times a power rangers episode show a power rangets face ANSWER: dont ask me im not that big of a power rangers!

why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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