- Anti Joke

How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

i just wrote this so hard

knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: silence Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

nolan is gay

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

Why did Lucy drop her ice-cream ? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who is there ? NOT LUCY !

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

what did jacob say to coach a joke

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than that? Two dead babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than that? Two dead trees naild to a baby.

Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops