A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happens if u call a black kid names? He tells an adult and u get in trouble

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The Irishman walked out of the bad.. Haha just kidding

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Oh and Nero, what are you suffering from? Is it dangerous? Are you dying or something? Please dont scare me like that again.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops