Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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