What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

your friend is so gay that he cuts of dicks as his part time job. and enjoys it.

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

Why was the man sad? His brother died.

Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

man1:did you know hellen keller had a dog? man2: no man1: neither did she

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...