What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

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What do you do at a club? You club.

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Roeses Are Red Violets Are Blue He's The One For Me And Not For You, And If You Try To Take My Place I Will Take My Fist And Smash Your Face(:

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What is the difference between a pizza and ten dead babies? I dont have a pizza in my oven.

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

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A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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Your mama is so fat. Just look at her.

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Q. What do mummies do when they run out of toilet paper? A. Nothing - they're dead and inanimate.

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You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

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How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens aren't very intelligent and therefore it didn't see the possible dangers that could occur.

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-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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