What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

Gay marriage is freaking gay.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red... That depends in how hard you throw them.

What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

what did the dog say to the muppet? WOOF

69

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

13 =B you just learned something

Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

What does it mean if your tv appears floating away in the dark? You had an awesome tv.

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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