A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

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Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

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There was a dog and a cat. What happens next? The cat's not there anymore. Neither is the dog. Can you guess what happend? The dog ate the cat, but the cat was his friend, so the dog committed suicide.

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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A wild Snorlax appeared crushing several members of the community

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What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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ewrg

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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What fires shots? A gun

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Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

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A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

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Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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