guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

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Q: If 2+2=Fish, then what does 3+3=? A: 6.

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A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (Knocker runs for his life).

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

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Why did the elephant cross the road? I don't know

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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