Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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tim tebow is a grat quarterback

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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Where's the soap?

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What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

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A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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