Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

lil billy wuz killed cuz of hiz relijuz beliefz

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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