How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

Why did Gavin kill Harley. Because his voices told him to.

Why is this site popular? Because people don't read the terms of service.

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

Knock knock. ... There was no reply because the resident was on holiday.

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

Roses are red violets are blue..... I have normal vision

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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