Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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You know what happens when you plant a baby into the soil and give it lots of sun and water? It dies.

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

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Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

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A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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Why don't you run over a black guy on a bike? Because It's probably your bike..

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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What's white and has a crusty nose? Luke Lange

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Your face

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Why is the white man sad? Because he watched the titanic

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Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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