Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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What's brown and smells like shit? The rapidly decaying bodies of several dead chipmunks.

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DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

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What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

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Why did the police officer beat the black man? Because the Internet is able to connect a variety of different types of people together and the off-duty police officer was slightly better at the multiplayer game they were playing.

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

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What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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